Weekend Listomania (Special "More Songs About Buildings and Food -- No, Just Food!" Video Edition)

[I originally posted a version of this back in 2008, and let's not even discuss how long ago that was. As usual, I've substituted some new entries and done some general rewriting, the idea being that you won't think I'm the lazy slacker I actually am. Thank you for your kind indulgence. -- S.S.]

Well, it's Friday, and you know -- or suspect -- what that means.

Yes, my congressional-manual-catharsis-technician Lauren Boebert and I will be following the road company of the new musical version of The Left Hand of God as part of their on-going tour of manicure joints at various shopping malls in safely Red states.

As a result, posting by moi will necessarily be somewhat fitful for a few days.

But until then, as always, here's a fun project for us all to contemplate:

BEST OR WORST POST-BEATLES COMMESTIBLE-THEMED POP/ROCK SONG OR BAND NAME!!!!

That's right, songs (and band names) referencing food and drink (nutritional value not important). Sorry about the post-Beatles thing, but otherwise there would be old songs too hideous/numerous to mention (so I won't mention any).

Another totally arbitrary rule: If anybody even mentions the band Bread, swear to god I'll take a hostage.

Why?

First of all, they mostly suck. Second of all, I am convinced they were in fact named in honor of money, not the staff of life.

Okay, here's my totally top of my head Top Ten:

10. The Murmaids -- Popsicles and Icicles

And speaking of Bread, I had no idea until yesterday that this pleasantly cheesy period (1964) piece of girl group schmaltz was actually written by Bread auteur David Gates. Hey -- I still think Bread sucks.

9. The Newbeats -- Bread and Butter

Also from 1964. I always liked this song, but until I found the video on YouTube I don't think I had ever seen the guys responsible for it, who are, let's face it, three of the biggest dorks ever. Interestingly (or tragically), the blonde guy in the middle went on to co-write Bette Midler's ever irksome "Wind Beneath My Wings."

9. Squeeze -- Black Coffee in Bed

I have a tendency to forget it, but these guys are fucking gods. I mean, wow.

8. Smashing Pumpkins -- Mayonaise

Believe it or not, I went through a period where I felt obligated to mention Billy Corgan and his pathetic bald dome in every Listomania I posted. Not sure why, except I figured I needed to be au courant.

7. ZZ Top -- TV Dinners

I was always partial to the Hungry Man Fried Chicken dinner, myself. Nice mashed potatoes and a cherry cobbler.

6. The Beatles -- Savoy Truffle

Not George Harrison's best song, perhaps, but the horns are a nice touch.

5. UB40 -- Red Red Wine

From the songbook of the great Neil Diamond, of course.

4. King Curtis -- Memphis Soul Stew

From Wiki: "On Friday August 13, 1971, at the height of a New York heat wave, King Curtis was carrying an air conditioner unit into his apartment at 50 W.86th St. He found his access blocked by two men administering drugs to themselves. He asked them to move. There was a scuffle, and one of the men, later identified as Juan Montanez, stabbed King Curtis in the heart with a knife. Curtis was hurried to Roosevelt Hospital, but was dead on arrival. The funeral was held four days later. As the mourners filed in, Curtis' Kingpins played an hour long version of "Soul Serenade" and a number of musicians got up to play. Jesse Jackson preached the service, and Stevie Wonder, Aretha Franklin, Cissy Houston, Brook Benton and Duane Allman were among those attending. Aretha sang the closing spiritual, 'Never Grow Old'. The Atlantic Records office closed for the day."

3. Hot Tuna -- Hesitation Blues

One of the things I loved about these guys was that they had actually wanted to call the band Hot Shit.

2. Blondie -- Eat to the Beat

I'll grant you drummer extraordinaire Clem Burke steals this one, but my god -- will you check out the cheekbones on the singer?

And the number one song about foodstuffs, it's so yummy that it's not even a contest so why are we talking, is --

1. Led Zeppelin -- The Lemon Song

What -- you mean it's not about citrus fruit?

Awrighty then -- what or who would your choices be?

And have a great weekend, everybody!!!