Weekend Listomania: Special "A Thing of Beauty is a Joy Forever" Edition

[I first posted a version of the below in 2007(!), when the world and this blog were young. Obviously, much has changed in the interim -- like many pronouns, for example -- and thus I've done some editing of the original language to conform with contemporary mores (although neither the word "binary" or "cis" will appear -- I have my standards). I've also substituted a couple of new entries, mostly because we like to have something dating from the current century every once in a while. In any case, enjoy, and keep it clean, kids. -- S.S.]

Well, it's Friday and you know what that means. Yes, my Congressional manual catharsis technician Rep. Lauren Boebert and I are off to fabulous New York City, where we'll be spending the next several days at a downtown Gentleman's (heh) Club for a Heritage Foundation-sponsored seminar/retreat whose theme is Sex With the Stupid: Fun or Not?

So regular QOPEC* postings will necessarily be somewhat, uh, premature for a couple of days, if you know what I mean.

But in my absence, here's a fun project for you all to contemplate:

All-Time Favorite Post-Elvis Pop/Rock Female (Traditional or Otherwise) Sex (er) Object!!!

You know -- the cutest, the hottest, the most historically significant, the one that you most wanted to boink. However you define it, that's cool, and it can either be a solo artist or someone/something in a band.

And my carefully considered Top Ten is:

10. The Duchess [Bo Diddley's gorgeous sister]

Note: She's the one on the right with the guitar.

9. Joan Jett

I would so switch teams for that woman (yeah, I know).

8. Phoebe Bridgers

As seen here with its band Boy Genius. All of whom could have me if they played their cards right, now that I think of it.

7. Patti Smith

Around the time that album came out, Patti famously told a rock journalist (I forget who) that she'd actually jerked off to the Mapplethorpe album photo, just to see what it would be like for her fans. I found that...intriguing.

6. Marianne Faithfull

Wotta babe.

5. Evie Sands

The sexiest suburban white girl(!) Brill Building chick(!!) of them all. I should add that Evie is still doing this kind of stuff live in clubs around L.A., and sounds and looks cooler than ever.

4. Courtney Love

Hey, what can I tell you -- as NYMary put it, I like 'em disheveled.

3. Chrissie Hynde

Let's just say I never had a waitress who was THAT interesting.

2. Pink

Look in the dictionary under "fiercely erotic" and there's a picture of her. Seriously -- she's about as stimulating as it gets, but the problem is I don't think I'd survive the foreplay.

And my all time number one rock femme de whoopie without a Y chromosome, there's no freaking contest so don't give me any shit about this, indisputably is....

1. Ronnie Spector!!!

Ah, Ronnie. Has there ever been a more arousing video for a crappy song by a doughy white guy who gets upstaged by his lady(!)guest star? Seriously -- that silhouetted wiggle, that cigarette being crushed by the high heel, that first moment when she sings "Be my little baby...." God, I love that whatever-that-is.

HONORABLE MENTION:

11a. Cousin Itt

For obvious reasons.

Alrighty then -- who else puts a lump (or something) in your shorts and/or brings you to the edge of wetness?

And have a great weekend, everybody!!!

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* QOPEC: a gender indefinite oil s/he/ik.