In the meantime, here's a little project for you all:
The Worst Rock Concert/Show You Ever Sat Through!!!!!!
My carefully considered choice:
Rush -- Beacon Theater, New York City, sometime in the mid-70s, playing stuff like "Working Man."
(That clip is from much later, of course, but you get the idea).
A few caveats here. I don't detest Rush. They're obviously accomplished musicians, I have a sneaking fondness for some of their 80s stuff (I like "Limelight" -- so sue me), and of course, their work on the Bob and Doug McKenzie single "Take Off" is nothing short of genius.
When I saw them, however, they were still playing mostly turtle-tempoed heavy metal blues-based aural sludge, and when you factored in Geddy Lee's so-high-only-dogs-can-hear-him vocals, the overall effect was light years beyond cringemaking. The only aural equivalent I can think of would be the sound made by a medieval peasant having his eyes gouged out with a burnt stick.
Really, they were just skullcrushingly annoying. The only reason I didn't flee to the lobby was out of some misplaced sense of critical responsibility.
So -- what was your worst?
[a coveted PowerPop No-Prize to reader Half Glass Full, who guessed it at just about the last possible minute. Kudos and huzzahs, my friend!]
36 comments:
A big-name band, right? Otherwise,
the field's way too crowded with awful opening acts at tiny clubs.
I might have to say the Grateful Dead. Or maybe Loverboy, who I got dragged to see circa 1981. (Though in retrospect, they were at least funny.)
Come to think of it, it was Sonic Youth, hands down. Saw 'em twice, and it was intolerably boring both times...kinda like watching one of those big, dumb flies bump into a windowpane over and over.
April 15, 1989
The Mecca, Milwaukee
The band: Grateful Dead
It was Brent Mydland bobble-head night. Man did it suck.
Even worse, though, was the party I went to you afterward. Suffice it to say that at one point I was forced to pry a tambourine out of some chick's hand and throw it in the garbage.
I've been to a few Neil Young Bridge Benefit shows over the past 10 years, and while I've enjoyed a lot of what they've offered, the absolute nadir for me have been the performances of Alanis Morrisette and Dave Matthews Band (different years, thankfully they didn't perform together).
I saw "The Professionals" in Mount Vernon, NY. They were so bad people were throwing full drinks at them.
"The Professionals" as in Paul Cook and Steve Jones of the Pistols??
Their only disc "I Didn't See it Coming" was pretty good punk pop.
Oh, I saw a dreadful Holly Golightly show at Maxwell's once. Appalling. The people I was with had been quite excited to see her, but later opined that it was possible she was on heroin again.
Maybe March 2003 or so?
Two personaly regrettable concert decisions come to mind: Nazareth at the Santa Monica Civic, circa 1978 (the exact date is lost in a contact-high fog, but with Ric Ocasek in the crowd, I'm confident of the year), and Joe Jackson Universal Amphitheater, August 1980. Nazareth was not ever my musical cup of tea, but I was seeing a girl who worked at Tower Records at the time, and she had comped tickets, so what the heck. How bad could it be? Pretty bad, as it turned out, although the crowd loved them. They were, to this non-fan, loud and turgid. Probably the loudest concert I ever endured (the Byrds at the Golden Bear coming in a close second), and to be fair, they redeemed themselves with a lively Shapes Of Things as an encore.
Joe Jackson was my cup of brew in 1980, doing his new-wave angry young Brit shtick, but that night the emphasis was on angry. He took the stage pissed off, insulted the crowd, was spat upon by someone in the front row (an impressive up-hill loogy lob, when you think about it), and stomped off the stage after about 20 minutes. Never came back. We left.
Sorry, I can't choose between 2 shows
(1)Eric Clapton, Omaha - late 70's or early 80's. So dull I would have rather watched one of those big dumb flies fly into a window.
(2)Pink Floyd, Arrowhead Stadium in Kansas City - late 80's or early 90's. Against my better judgement I was talked into going by a friend. I never did understand what people saw in that band and it certainly wasn't made clear by that show. As far as I could tell the entire crowd was watching a different (and much more entertaining) show than the one I was able to see. When the giant inflatable pig "floated" over the stadium the entire stadium erupted. I spoiled it for the girl sitting next to me and told her there was a wire holding the pig up. Pretty sure that ruined my very remote chances of a meaningful relationship with her but I couldn't resist.
I saw Ronnie Spector sometime in 1980 at the Youngstown Agora. She was touring for the recently released "Siren" LP.
The opening band, they were called the Headlights I think, (who supposedly had some great powerpop singles) was also Ronnie's backup band. They finished their set and we waited over 1 hour before Ronnie came on.
Finally, the curtains opened and the band started playing the opening cut on the LP, her cover of the Ramones' "Here Today, Gone Tomorrow. No Ronnie. There was just a stool were she should have been. Suddenly, from stage right, Ronnie walked unsteadily on stage propped up by her manager. He plopped her down onto the stool. She began to sing, but couldn't remember the words. She finally managed to finish the song and the band started a second tune. For this one, she tried to stand up and bang, she hit the deck like a sack of wet cement. Her manager rushed out, picked her up, put her back on the stool and you could read his lips as he told her not to leave the stool again. Of course, she didn't listen.
She was literally doing an impersonation of the Gilda Radner Candy Slice character. This painfully went on for what seemed like an eternity, but in reality, it was probably just two or three songs more. Some guys in the front row had been egging her on the entire show to lift up her shirt. She eventually did, and that was the last straw. The manager rushed out, grabbed her and the show was over. So was my fantasy of Ronnie as a 60s girl-group queen. We met the band after the show and they told us that this sort of thing was happening quite often on the tour.
I haven't heard much about Ronnie lately, but I hope she kicked whatever substance abuse problem she had at that time.
Blue Oyster Cult at Zivko's, 1984 or so.
Right at the lowest point, they were down to 2 original members, and wow. so bad.
And I like the band, normally. I'll go see 'em nowadays.
But then.... I don't know if it was the bitter rage, the lack of good new material, the cocaine... or the lack of...
Blecch.
And that's beating out a Foghat show.
Some boy when I was in college was trying to win my heart. He took me on a date to a surprise concert. We had to take the train to some sports arena outside the city... for...
Jethro Tull!
Needless to say, we were not a good match! But, although I remember nothing about the concert and less about the boy, it was still fun because it was so bizarre.
And just so I can keep mentioning Townes Van Zandt whenever possible: I had to endure Martin Sexton opening for him once (I know you said no opening bands, but...) I was sitting with Townes during Martin's set, and when I asked him what he thought, he deadpanned, "I'm enjoying the theatrics."
It was July 6, 1975, the venue was the Cotton Bowl at State Fair Park in Dallas, mid-July, on a sun-baked 100 degree day.
Four bands. Openers Montrose followed by power trio Trapeze. Both gawd-awful beyond belief, heinous boogie and guitar wanking, the heat and pot stench almost overwhelming. Then the Eagles, just prior to their "glory" days bored me to tears with such fare as "Already Gone", etc. Finally, the Rolling Stones appeared early evening, accompanied by the infamous giant inflatable penis. Frankly I don't remember if Mick Taylor was still around by then, and I have no good memories of their performance, just lots of mincing by Jagger and sloppy playing by the rest of the boys.
I was sitting with Townes during Martin's set, and when I asked him what he thought, he deadpanned, "I'm enjoying the theatrics."
9/07/2007 5:34 PM
Oh dear god.
:-)
When the giant inflatable pig "floated" over the stadium the entire stadium erupted. I spoiled it for the girl sitting next to me and told her there was a wire holding the pig up. Pretty sure that ruined my very remote chances of a meaningful relationship with her but I couldn't resist.
Spoilsport. ;)
The Eagles, circa 1977, Richfield Coliseum.
While technically proficient, they captured the bloat that stadium rock was wallowing in at the time to a tee.
Excruciatingly dull and lifeless was their performance and we were within 20 rows of the stage in great floor seats!
We had acquired said tickets while loitering in the mens room "making a deal" when some kid comes dashing into a stall with a Cleveland city cop in close pursuit.
Of course the cop won the tussle and after the fracas we found the youth's jean jacket had been left behind with the aforementioned 4 floor seats and a small bag of some pretty decent weed.
We thought that we had the jackpot...until the Eagles took the stage.
Of course the cop won the tussle and after the fracas we found the youth's jean jacket had been left behind with the aforementioned 4 floor seats and a small bag of some pretty decent weed.
We thought that we had the jackpot...until the Eagles took the stage.
Fucking hilarious.
"The Boys of Summer" notwithstanding, Mojo Nixon had it right...
Mojo Nixon.
Now that is a funny guy. I think that he's got a radio show on Sirius called Lying Cocksuckers.
Brilliant.
Kid Charlemagne said...
I saw Ronnie Spector sometime in 1980 at the Youngstown Agora. She was touring for the recently released "Siren" LP.
One of my oldest friends (and the drummer in my skinny tie band) played on that album and co-wrote one or more of the songs....
One of my oldest friends (and the drummer in my skinny tie band) played on that album and co-wrote one or more of the songs....
Was she sober when she recorded it?
Was she sober when she recorded it?
Oh yeah. But she was a notorious party animal at that point.
I met her at a party after a show where she sang with Springsteen in -- I think -- '78.
I was absolute jello in her presence -- I mean she was Ronni fucking Spector. Yipes, was she hot.
She actually told me I was cute and that I reminded her of Phil.
My wife says Michael Penn at the Loring Pasta Bar was her worst show. She continues to love Michael Penn, but at this show he was performing to a very small audience and he seemed pinned to the very back of the stage where he kept yelling at the dishwasher, telling him to be more quiet. (The Aimee Mann birthday video made me write this.)
Rather than to pick on loud, amusical "hard rock" bands that all blurred together and that merely put me to sleep in auditorium seats in the late 1970s, let me nominate Yo La Tengo. I like Yo La Tengo and have seen them before and after their memorably bad show at 7th Street Entry, Minneapolis, early 1990s. For this particular show, they were deafening in a literal sense, easily the loudest show I have ever seen, and were amusical as well (or perhaps so creative that I didn't get it.) The effect was beyond the worst of Rossington Collins. I still blame this particular show any time I can't hear something.
"She actually told me I was cute and that I reminded her of Phil."
No offense, steve, but that must have been the equivalent of an acid flashback for her.
Maybe Syd Straw on the night that she had obviously smoked too much pot, and had an onstage meltdown eerily reminiscent of Ronee Blakely's in "Nashville?"
Buddy Guy! One of my running buddies worships him, but every time his endless yammering schtick has left me cold, cold, cold. Shut up and play yer guitar...
And it's sad to say that the only time I saw Townes Van Zandt, he was just staggeringly drunk and couldn't remember the words to his own songs. And I'll never have another chance...- Bill Buckner
You know, tons of people have told me that Yo La Tengo was great. I'd buy a disc, and it was inevitably dreadfully boring. Then someone else, would say, "No! Get "Summer Sun"! I'd buy it and it would be awful too. I did this about 4 times. I know better now.
I knew Ira and his charming wife back in the day, and I still don't get Yo La Tengo.
To me they were always Jon Tiven's little dopey brother band.
Possibly the worst show I have ever seen. . .U2 in Omaha, NE in December 2005. Let me say it wasn't a bad show, I just haven't seen a ton of shows. I saw them in 1992, and it was awesome. This time . . .not so much. It appeared so staged. It was almost as if they really weren't playing live, it was so choreographed and directed that it lost the element of what I think live music should be - "Spontaneous." Granted I will say it was the third or second to last show of the tour, and they sounded really good. But I just couldn't get over how artificial it seemed. I will say that I was, and to some extent still am, a U2 fan. But that really took the luster off of them for me.
Deep Purple in 76. They were definitely having an off night and couldn't put it together, even for "Smoke on the Water".
But the opening act was Electric Light Orchestra, and they blew the roof off!
REM at Hoch Auditorium Kansas University, 1984 or 1985. They were touring to support "The Reckoning". They gave no indication that they cared to actually all be playing the same song at the same time, and they were amped so loud, that even in the back row it was physically painful to listen. Only concert I ever walked out of.
Peter Frampton in '76 (we went for the opening band, J. Geils). He was on the knife-edge of being either a guitar hero or a teenybopper hero. He chose teenybopper.
Out of love for Mrs. Gummo, I went to see the Dave Matthews Band at Giants Stadium. Let's just say, luckily her ardor for Dave has cooled since then. Dull, dull, dull.
Just recently, saw Nick Cave's latest group, Grinderman, open for the White Stripes, and boy, did Grinderman suck. Think of a cross between Metallica and Pere Ubu, with none of the talent or quirky charm. They drove most of the audience out of the arena.
Richard Lloyd around '79, '80 at a NYC club. He could barely stand up. It was pitiful.
Over 20 years, I saw the Grateful Dead many times. They did some of the best shows I ever saw; they also did some of the WORST shows I ever saw. Talk about a crapshoot.
A too-fucked-up-play Guns & Roses, October 1987, at Hammerjack's in Baltimore - right before "Welcome to the Jungle" hit it big on MTV and they were still doing club shows. A friend was managing the record store at the U of Maryland student union, got the promo copy of the album, and insisted that "these guys were gonna be HUGE!" We paid $6, and the sucked so bad that we wanted it back.
Heather said...
A too-fucked-up-play Guns & Roses
I always get a laugh thinking about the drummer they fired for being too fucked up.
I mean, seriously -- how fucked up do you have to be to get kicked out of fucking Guns & Roses.
I mean, seriously -- how fucked up do you have to be to get kicked out of fucking Guns & Roses.
I know, right? Although to be fair, we were pretty high that night ourselves.
I recently met a music photographer who told me a story about seeing a junked-up Axel Rose puking in his oxygen mask one night, then handing it to a roadie to clean. Gross!
Second worst show was the Bongos at the 9:30 Club, right before they broke up. They came on two hours late and Richie Barone was obviously coked out of his gourd. They played for barely 45 minutes then left. I find bad club shows to be terribly disappointing, more so than any of the bad stadium shows I've been subjected to (Rush, Waters-less Pink Floyd, Sammy Hagar-era Van Halen).
Worst-ever? That'd be a three-way tie.
1. Grateful Dead, 1989. Oh-so-boring. In three plus hours they acknowledged the presence of the audience not once. I don't mean "Hello Atlanta!" but even looking up or mumbling. I own a dozen-plus GD studio albums, and the only song they did I had even HEARD before was a Dylan cover.
2. "Badfinger," 1982. This was the Joey-led version, as opposed to the also-touring-tehn Tommy version. The players didn't even seem to know the songs. And Joey, gove love'im, was always the last of the main four anyway.
3. Styx, Mr. Roboto Tour. They show opened with an incredibly inance long-form music video. Concept album? Ha! They really sucked.
Dishonorable mention: The Police at Bonnaroo 2007. See my feature in this month's SKOPE Magazine for details.
Gawd, you'd never know I'm an editor. Forgive the mucho-typo post. Joey was the "least" of the four. Well, actually the last (surviving), too, but that wasn't my point.
Forgot one! The Grateful Dead, Dylan and Tom Petty, RFK Stadium, July 6 1986. Skullcrushingly boring, hot as hell, and jam-packed with filthy, tripping assholes. Only Petty was in the slightest bit entertaining. Apparently Jerry Garcia went into a coma two weeks later - he was already well on his way by this show. I wouldn't listen to the Dead for 20 years after that BS show.
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