Well, it's Friday and you know what that means. Yes, my Oriental manservant Hop-Sing and I are off to Princeton University to attend the Annual Northern New Jersey Organgina Festival with our old chastity buddy Francisco Nava ('09). Obviously, there'll be no hanky-panky of any kind, at least for a few days, so posting by moi will be necessarily sporadic for a while.
But in my absence, here's a fun project for you all to contemplate:
All-Time Top Pop/Rock Male Sex Object
You know -- the cutest, the hottest, the most historically significant, the one that you most wanted to be or boink. However you define it, either solo artist or in a band.
Alert readers will, of course, recall that last week I posted my fave female pop/rock eye candy, so it seems only logical to flip the premise this time out. And to bring in an expert from the other team.
Therefore, please give it up for special guest blogger the divine Brooklyn Girl, who will now offer her carefully considered Top Ten, along with accompanying pithy and mildly salacious comments.
Go get 'em, BG!!!
10. Barry Gibb
Those legs! Those teeth! That hair! And a falsetto to die for. Where would John Travolta be without him?
9. Steven Tyler
So he has a mouth bigger than the Holland Tunnel, he moves like a spastic marionette, and you wouldn't bring him home to meet your mother … he'd either try to ball her or he'd raid her scarf drawer. But still ...
Name me one other small-boned man who can wear ruffles, purple suits, eye make-up and high heels, and still come across suavely macho. Oh, did I mention that he can dance, too?
7. Lou Reed
Sullen and volatile … art rock's bad boy. And who can resist a bad boy?
6. Bruce Springsteen
Somewhere along the line, when Bruce cleaned himself up a little and discovered free weights, he got hot. He's usually pretty discreet, but when he stands up and slowly adjusts the microphone … I can't imagine what he's implying there, can you?
5. Jeff Beck
I know he doesn't sing. And maybe he doesn't even play rock (he's the only one of the Yardbirds' guitarists not in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame). And yes, he has a big nose (but we know what that means … or is it big hands? Either way, he's got it covered). Anyway, no other guy exudes such heat without even opening his mouth. Especially one who is over sixty.
4. Jim Morrison
Leather pants? In 1967? Oy gevalt.
3. Michael Hutchence
Okay, maybe he's somewhat derivative of the previous guy on the list, but he positively oozes lust out of every pore ... he's not exactly subtle (after all, he's wearing a pin that says "SEX") but if I looked and moved like that, I wouldn't be subtle, either.
2. Mick Jagger
Always in control, always in command. He put it right out there forty years ago (talk about eye-fucking the camera!)...
...and he still does.
1. Elvis Presley
The Once and Future King. Even after 50 years. Not only was he astoundingly handsome, he had that perfectly curled lip, the little shoulder twitch, and the famous Sulllivan-banned pelvis …no wonder the girls squealed.
Okay -- those are BG's picks. So who are your faves? And by the way -- is it getting warm in here, or is just me?
[special thanks for kibbitzing: slutty jewish girl]
[Editor's note: Steve asked me to post this for him while he was away. Kid C.]