Oh Good God

Anyone who knows me is probably aware of my inordinate pride that I have yet to watch, under my own steam, a single episode of reality TV. I did see one episode each of two separate Survivors, and in both cases spent the episode fending off the complex explanations offered by whoever it was whose idea it was to watch the show. Honestly, people, if you're interested in tracking complicated political interconnections for big stakes, spend your time figuring out why the fuck the Royal House of Saud gets to set American foreign policy and then fund suicide bombers all while walking hand-in-hand with the prez. (The soundtrack to that stroll really should have included Leo Sayer and/or the Little River Band.) We could break it up into one hour weekly segments, if you'd like.

ANYWAY, reality TV holds no charm for me, but it's doing its best to weasel its way into the .001% of the population who have so far avoided its range. Evidence: Hit Me Baby One More Time. To wit:

Veteran hitmakers perform and compete! Based on the popular UK show of the same name, "Hit Me Baby One More Time" tracks down hitmakers from the past and they take the stage in a new competition in which you're the judge! Former Top Ten artists return to perform their trademark hit song along with one of today's current hits. At the end of the night, the live audience votes for their favorites!
Coming Soon...
Wang Chung, The Knack, Irene Cara, Sophie B. Hawkins, Cameo, Tommy Tutone, Vanilla Ice, The Motels and more!

This week, A Flock of Seagulls, Loverboy, Tiffany, and CeCe Peniston. (Apparently, Tiffany was on the British one, too. Huh.)

NYMary's fearless prediction: this show will tell us nothing except which kitsch is currently in vogue. 80's garbage bag bands? Mall girl disco? Headbanded Canadians? There can be only one....

And another fearless prediction: The Knack will take home the gold at the end of the series. If they don't, I'll buy you a drink next time I see you. (Except for you, Thersites. Our usual bet applies.)