It's Official -- the Greatest Songwriter in the English Language of the Last Sixty Years Is....

...fuck you Lennon & McCartney, fuck you Bob Dylan, fuck you Townes Van Zandt, fuck you Jay-Z (and BTW, extremely fuck you Jay-Z, and this is a subject for a future posting but Jeebus fuck, the idea that anybody takes that hack seriously as a writer or anything else is simply mind-boggling), fuck you Stephen Merritt, fuck you Leonard Cohen, fuck you Holland-Dozier-Holland, and basically fuck everybody else because the winner is...

Mel Brooks.

That's right, Mel fucking Brooks.

Exhibit A, from the soundtrack to The Twelve Chairs -- "Hope For the Best, Expect the Worst."

Hope for the best, expect the worst,
Some drink champagne, some die of thirst.
No way of knowing which way it's going,
Hope for the best, expect the worst.

Hope for the best, expect the worst,
The world's a stage, we're unrehearsed.
Some reach the top, friends, while others flop, friends,
Hope for the best, expect the worst.

I knew a man who saved a fortune that was splendid
Then he died the day he planned to go and spend it
Shouting, Live while you're alive!
No one will survive!
Life is sorrow, here today and gone tomorrow
Live while you're alive
No one will survive
There's no guarantee.

Hope for the best, expect the worst,
You could be Tolstoy, or Fanny Hurst
So take your chances, there are no answers,
Hope for the best, expect the worst.

I knew a man who saved a fortune that was splendid
Then he died the day he planned to go and spend it
Shouting, Live while you're alive!
No one will survive!
Life is funny, drink your wine and spend your money
Live while you're alive
No one will survive
There's no guarantee.

Hope for the best, expect the worst,
The rich are blessed, the poor are cursed.
That is a fact, friends. The deck is stacked, friends.
Hope for the best, expect the...

Even with a good beginning
It's not certain that you're winning
Even with the best of chances
Fate can kick you in the pantses

Look out for the...
Watch out for the...
WORST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

.

Wordplay, laughs, profundity -- it doesn't get any better than that. Seriously.

I should add that the above song can be found on the CD version of the fabulous late 70s elpee Elektra released of songs from Mel's movies through High Anxiety (which can be ordered over at Amazon here), and no finer anthology of popular music can be found anywhere at any price.

You're welcome.