Flogging a Deceased Equine

So I've been noticing -- and I realize that this is an insight that's occurred to everybody else on the planet considerably earlier -- that when discussions about the pop music of the last ten years take place these days it is now all but obligatory to mention that Creed, in fact, suck. I mean, it's almost a reflexive thing at this point. Sort of like, "Hi, nice to see you, and by the way Creed suck."

As I said, I'm late to the party about this, but I find the phenomenon particularly amusing since Creed is one of those bands I went out of my way to avoid back in their day, apparently out of some sort of critical instinct that told me that they would, no question, suck more than even some other really sucky bands that I hadn't had the foresight to avoid. I'm not kidding about this. Although I probably did hear a Creed song on the radio or in a commercial without meaning to over the last decade, I can state categorically that I was never consciously aware of it or them; in fact, apart from their name and the fact that they were sort of famous, absolutely nothing about them had impinged on my consciousness in any meaningful way. Until, that is, our current moment, when decrying their suckitude has reached the status of cultural signifier.

Anyway, I was thinking about this the other day, and so I decided to bite the bullet, get on the bandwagon (however belatedly) and finally listen to and watch one of their hits on YouTube. Which led me to this Lovecraftian horror, live on Leno.



Ye cats, what an unlistenable song. Guess what -- Creed really do suck, probably more than just about anything else has sucked in the history of the universe. Jeebus -- the guitar player alone (don't even get me started on what he's wearing) is enough to ensure them a prominent place in the Trans-Dimensional Things That Completely Suck Hall of Fame.

Man, do they suck.

I could go on about exactly why, of course, but since this kid lays it all out for you in such laborious detail, I've decided I don't have to. In any case, I would like to state for the record that -- in recognition of his invaluable service -- I would like to meet him someday, if not quite shake his hand.