Weekend Listomania (Special Yo, Frankie! Audio/Video Edition)

Well, it's Friday (and a holiday weekend) and you know what that means. Yes, my Oriental Courtesan Action Figure Fah Lo Suee and I will be off to my local Hell Megaplex, where we plan to wait out Hurricane Earl with endless viewings of Sylvester Stallone's The Expendables, or as we call it around Casa Simels, the Greatest Movie of All Time.

That being the case, and because things will doubtless be a little quiet around here for a couple of days, here's a fun little project for us to wile away the hours:

Best or Worst Post-Elvis Pop/Rock/Soul Song or Record By or About the Sons (or Daughters) of Italy!!!

Self-explanatory, I think, so no arbitrary rules of any kind, you're welcome very much. Basically, if it's about something Italian, or if an Italian wrote, sang or produced it, you can include it.

And my totally top of my head Top Six is:

6. Bananarama -- Robert DeNiro's Waiting



You know, all that cheezy Big 80s stuff notwithstanding, I really miss these babes.

5. David Bowie -- Slip Away



Bowie's tribute to the great kids TV celeb "Uncle" Floyd Vivino, and I have to give the pretentious little poser credit -- this was a very cool thing to do. Incidentally, I was hoping to include Floyd's "Oogie's Song," perhaps my favorite single of the '70s, but I couldn't find it anywhere online.

4. Foreigner -- Hot Blooded



That would be Lou Gramm(atico) on the hot blooded vocals, of course. When Dean of American Rock Critics Robert Christgau referred to Foreigner as "the world's most useless band," this may have been what he was thinking about.

3. Carl Perkins -- Put Your Cat Clothes On



"I slicked up myself till I looked like a Guinea." Actually, Perkins didn't really sing that, although Greil Marcus, in his otherwise authoritative Mystery Train, quotes the lyric thusly.

2. Hall and Oates -- Italian Girls




My favorite H&O song, if truth be told. And "I see the greatest works of art in Western Civilization" is probably the coolest second line in rock history.

And the Numero Uno faccia bella serenade just has to be, you wanna make something of it?, the incomparable...

1. Holly and the Italians -- Tell That Girl to Shut Up



For many obvious reasons.

Alrighty then -- what would your choices be?

[Shameless Blogwhore: My parallel Cinema Listomania -- theme: the heroic struggle of the oppressed workers against their Capitalist Pig overlords!!! -- is now up over at Box Office. As always, if you could find it in your heart to leave a comment over there, despite the annoying new commenting system, it would make it easier for me to stick it to The Man. Thanks!]