Friday, August 30, 2024

La Fin de La Semaine Essay Question: Special "Hey, We Can't All Be James Dean" Edition

Well, it's Friday, and you know what that means. Yes....

Hmm.

Okay, I got nothing.

Seriously, I find the current state of the world so exhausting of late -- and you know who and what I'm talking about -- that I simply don't have the energy to craft one of my stock opening topical jokes about my Asian fille de whoopie Fah Lo Suee and I going to visit somebody or something. My apologies, but ever since Trump's fans started wearing tampons on their ears, my get up and go has just got up and went.

So let's get right to business. To wit:

...and your favorite (or least favorite) post-Elvis individual pop star or group's collective exemplar of coolness (or non-coolness), visually, is...???

No aritrary rules, but just so we're clear -- we're talking coolness. I.e. on the sartorial, conceptual and attitudinal level, although your definition may vary, obviously. But basically, the stuff that makes rock-and-roll interesting in the first place.

Okay, here's my fave (and I'm sure you won't be surprised).

I mean, they're all just too cool for school, as we used to say. But -- Chrissie Hynde? That voice. That look. Those bangs. Whew --- what ever IT is, she's got it.

Oh, and my least favorite? These assholes.

Oh right, you're so groovy dressing up like a cat. Wow. Who amongst us didn't want to grow up to be a cat? Yeah, right -- that'll get the girls.

Okay, yes, I'm exaggerating about this, but only sightly; I find the critical respect for those guys (and my old friend and colleague Doug Brod has a well-regarded book out now making the case for them as artistes) absolutely incomprehensible on every level.

I mean, if you're gonna do crap like that, at least do what GWAR did...

...i.e., the same shtick, but obviously as a goof. Because if you do it seriously, like KISS, you will look like total putzes.

In other words -- Not. Cool. 😎

But enough of my yakking.

So -- what would YOUR choices be?

And have a great weekend, everybody!!!

35 comments:

mistah charley, sb, ma, phd, jsps said...

john waite video "these times are hard for lovers" - lead singer looks good, guitarist looks very good, but the 3 backup singers ooh la la

edward said...

Well, if you are just talking a look that would get the girls in a specific time and place while slinging a guitar, for me it would be a toss up between Born to Run era Bruce and No Nukes era Bruce. At least it was among the girls I knew then.

Anonymous said...

Cool: Jimi Hendrix, Chrissie Hynde
Not cool: any of the current top 40 divas

- Paul in DK

Anonymous said...

Hard to argue with either of your choices. Are they truly critically respected, for I've not heard that. Even as the target gender/age in Kiss' heyday, my friends and I recognized schlock and rejected it. But I confess, I never listened to them, and just heard bits here and there -- none of which dissuaded me from my low opinion. Then, in the 1990s, I was in Amoeba S.F. and they played an album over the sound system that I found annoyingly grating, plodding and just plain stoopid (I can't do 'background' music, for if it's something I like, I'm focussed on that, and if it's something I don't like, I can't ignore it). Only when 'Black Diamond' came on did I know who it was, since my beloved Replacements had covered that. Yes, I felt a little smug that I'd heard Kiss, not knowing it was them, and honestly rejected it without prejudice.
Original line-up Pretenders was my first concert. They were still small enough to be playing at the local college.
C in California

Anonymous said...

Cool- Chris Isaak, Russel Mael of Sparks
Uncool- Ron Mael of Sparks, grumpy old Van Morrison ( as opposed to cool young Van Morrison) rs

Cleveland Jeff said...

Robert Palmer was one ultra cool dude

steve simels said...

True story -- his first band (They were called Dada) played my old school in like 70 or 71. Palmer already had that Look down. So I snuck into their dressing room and came this close to stealing one of his blue crushed velvet sports jackets.

John K said...

February 9, 1964. The Beatles on Ed Sullivan.

Anonymous said...

Cool Keith Richards. Uncool Morrissey

Rob B Mullen said...

At times I have a yen for country - Three that I consider the coolest -
Johnny Cash, Waylon Jennings, Marty Stewart and the Superlatives
rob

Rob B Mullen said...

Close runner-up - Dwight Yoakum
rob

steve simels said...

It just dawned on me — Matty Healy of the 1975. Last male pop star I’ve ever wanted to be.😎

getawaygoober said...

Legendary Stardust Cowboy

cthulhu said...

Bryan Ferry, especially in the mid-‘80s BΓͺte Noire period, had a classic cool look down pat. Another classic cool look in that same time period was Duane Eddy, in fringed buckskin jacket and white Stetson, appearing live with the Art of Noise doing their joint cover of the classic Peter Gunn theme. And in an adjacent part of the “how to look cool” spectrum…Chris Isaak wears a Nudie suit onstage, which is very cool.

Uncool…Kiss of course, but I’ll also single out the shirtless look of people like Mark Farner and his ilk. The only person who could pull off the shirtless look and still be cool is Iggy Pop.

Allan Rosenberg said...

Coolest ever: X

Uncool: Fans of metal bands at metal shows.

Captain Al

Anonymous said...

Dylan from 1965-1968
Hendrix from Hey Joe to Belly Button Window
Francoise Hardy
Jimmy Page - Mastermind of iconic Zeppelin. From the time he was in the Yardbirds, he always dressed like a rock star. Except for the 2nd half of 1970 when he cut his hair and took to wearing that stupid fishing hat from Bath to Blueberry Hill. In 1972 the first of his designed rock star outfits debuted in Southern California. Undoubtedly because that was where the seamstress lived. The first time he wore one of these was 1972-06-22 in, what was then my hometown, San Bernardino at the Swing Auditorium. Ah, San Bernardino. It was a test market for radio, so we got a lot of songs aired that didn't always break in bigger markets. It was a badass place to live in the 60's. E Street, from Highland to Orange Show Road, was the car cruising capital of Southern California. From 1966 to March 1967 we had John Peel opening up our heads on KMEN. It was the only station in the USA to play the import-only single, "I Can Take You to the Sun," by the Misunderstood contemporaneously. Speaking of which:

The Misunderstood - Particularly Glenn Ross Campbell & Rick Brown. You've never heard their feedback drenched psychedelic instrumental, "The Trip." These guys took it to a whole other level.
Suzi Quatro
Bryan Ferry
Blondie
Grace Slick
T. Rex
Amanda Lear
Tom Petty
Marianne Faithfull
John Lennon bowing his knees in beat with the songs
Rolling Stones lip synching to I Got You Babe on Ready Steady Go
Lynne Carey - for Mama Lion LP cover shot
Paul McCartney - Yesterday on Sullivan
UNCOOL -
Freddie Garrity / Freddie and the Dreamers
Milli Vanilli
Vanilla Ice
Leo Sayer
Rick Astley

VR

M_Sharp said...

Los Straightjackets - Mexican wrestling masks, suits & ties, rock, 'n roll instrumentals, and they're Nick "The Jesus Of Cool" Lowe's band. How cool is that??

Anonymous said...

I forgot -

Rolling Stones - Guy Webster photos inside the Big Hits LP
Keith Richards - Ethan Russell 1972 tour photo "Patience Please - A Drug Free America Comes First

VR

BG said...

Cool: Jeff Beck, Patti Smith

Uncool: the original costumes worn by the Young Rascals, Yoko Ono (unlike John, who was cool)

Anonymous said...

UNCOOL -

Twisted Sister
Ratt
Motley Crue

danny1959 said...

Tom Waits will always be cool. And Dylan is effortlessly cool as well. Also, the original Byrds.

Gordy G. said...

Cool: James Gang

Uncool: The Eagles

steve simels said...

What — no love for Little Richard in THE GIRL CANT HELP IT?

Anonymous said...

totally agree there.
rs

Anonymous said...

I have much love for Little Richard (in the platonic sense).

Of all the early rockers he captured what R&R was all about more than anyone else. He truly scared the parents of America, and with good reason.

Don’t get me started. (Or maybe do get me started)!

Captain Al

Anonymous said...

must elaborate a bit here- the concept of 'coolness' must include a healthy amount of humility and i think these guys have this for certain. rs

Rob B Mullen said...

Duane Allman - epitome of cool in the photo of him playing while wearing his Flaming Phoenix shirt
Also Dwight, Marty.and Gram wearing their full on Nudie suits
rob

Alzo said...

Ron is so uncool, he's come out the other side. The dood rools.

Alzo said...

Kiss is not a band. Kiss is a means to sell a lunchbox.

Alzo said...

Oh yeah, the subject at hand...
Robert Gordon never breathed an uncool breath in his life.
Absolute uncoolest: Gary Glitter

mistah charley, sb, ma, phd, jsps said...

in terms of music not appearance i thought the trombone cover of "carry on wayward son" was very cool

Tinpot said...

Billy Zoom. Seen live (early 8o's?) no one else came close.

Anonymous said...

COOL -
Dave Alvin
John Doe
Eddie Cochran
Joan Jett
Dennis Wilson
Steven Tyler
Joe Perry
Ronnie Wood
Annie Haslam
Evie Sands
Mink Deville
Eric Clapton 1968A with very long hair & mustache
Eric Clapton 1968B shorter hair clean shaven Farewell Tour
Ann & Nancy Wilson in their early days
FAKEST COOL POSER
Lenny Kravitz
UNCOOL -
Mike Love
Phil Collins
Jonathan King
Eating chocolate cake in a bag (or doing anything in a bag - fuck Bagism)
Loverboy
Dave Matthews
Kevin Dubrow
The Snobs on Red Skelton
Adam Duritz
Coldplay
Eric Clapton 1967 white-fro - a mistake
James Harman

VR time to launch

steve simels said...

Heh.😎

Anonymous said...

Gram Parsons inside gatefold photograph of GP LP

Of course, the outside cover of GP sitting in the Chateau Marmont is cool. But, for me, the inside photo of him casually standing next to a semi with a set of doubles loaded with 400 bales of alfalfa slays. It fuckin' rules. In my mind it upped his cool factor 1000 per cent!

Let me explain. In my high school days, one of the guys I messed around with drove just such a truck. Only his had a sleeper cab, id est, it had a bed behind the seats. On many occasions, I accompanied him when he drove to Imperial Valley to pick up alfalfa hay at the many different growers. I love the smell of freshly cured alfalfa in the morning. Alfalfa and diesel, even more. This guy (Paul) made the run from Chino to Imperial Valley (or Blythe), and back, at least once a day. Sometimes twice.

There were a lot of unique and interesting characters in the hay biz. Kinda like the wild west in some respects. It wasn’t long until I learned the inner workings and tricks of the trade. And the dope smuggling opportunities. Just playin’ it straight, Paul made at least 300 bucks a day if he did one run. If he pushed it and did two, he doubled his money. Occasionally he’d take a ton of dope in 100-pound bales dressed inside his 20 tons of alfalfa. One of the hay companies for which he freelanced gave him 5 grand a trip for the risk. But that was only one or two days a month. He lived comfortably and had a lot of toys. 300-600 bucks a day was a lot of money in the early 70’s. We had a lot of fun riding together with seldom a dull moment. The Peterbilt was rockin’. Paul loved having me along as a co-conspirator in mischief, whether it was sexual, or otherwise. We made the drive together 100’s of times and deeply bonded. We were still hanging out with each other when GP got released in early January 1973. I had no idea it had come out, but I knew it was in progress from several articles in the local papers from 1972. I actually went to the store to buy the Beach Boys Holland and ended up buying both. Paul and I nearly fell over and died when we opened the gatefold. It was something else! It didn't get any cooler than that in our eyes!


VR