Friday, September 05, 2014

Weekend Listomania's Greatest Hits: Special Masculin Féminin Edition

[I originally posted this one back in 2008, which is so long ago that my testicles hadn't even descended at that point. In any case, I've done some rewriting and added a couple of new entries, just because at my age I need to keep my brain occupied. Enjoy! -- S.S.]


You guys rarely play by the rules, so let me simply say anyway that songs with the titular words "boy" or "girl" are clearly Non U for the purposes of today's discussion. With the exception of number 5, for obvious reasons.

Okay, here's my totally top of my head Top Eight.

8. Richard X. Heyman -- Masquerader Man

A great song, obviously, but included here mostly because we like to have something recorded in this century. Also, he gets bonus points for having the word "man" in his last name.

7. Bo Diddley -- Say Man

Bo and (I believe) his maraca man Jerome Green talking trash. It took over 50 years for Samuel L. Jackson's "Go the Fuck to Sleep" to top it.

6. Deep Purple -- Woman From Tokyo

Were these guys the worst dressed major band of all time or what?

5. Urge Overkill -- Girl You'll Be a Woman Soon

From the Pulp Fiction soundtrack, obviously. These guys took a load of shit back in the day for not being sufficiently ironic when covering Neil Diamond. You know what? It's a great song...unironically.

4. Black Sabbath -- Iron Man

This clip is better than the Robert Downey movie of the same name. I'm not kidding about this!!!

3. Gene Pitney -- The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance

I prefer the John Otway version, but this will do in a pinch.

2. Helen Reddy -- I Am Woman

This may be not only just the worst song with the word "woman" in the title, but in fact the worst song with any other words whatsoever in the title. In fairness, however, I've always loved the story about Mary Travers being offered the song first; she ultimately turned it down because whenever she tried to record it, she inevitably wound up convulsed in hysterical laughter. Usually at the "I am invincible" part.

And the bestest ever song with man or woman in the title, it's not even close so don't bug me already, is obviously --

1. Peter and Gordon -- Woman

At the height of Beatlemania Paul McCartney gave this to P&G under a pseudonym, the idea being to see if it would be a hit even if nobody knew it was written by a Beatle. Sure enough, it was, although if memory serves the secret didn't stay secret for long.

Awright then -- what would your choices be?


edward said...

The first worst to come to mind in Gary Puckett and The Union Gap "Woman, Woman" followed by "This Girl is A Woman Now" which gets Girl and Woman in the title.

Just to skirt around the rules some more
Nick Lowe and His Cowboy Outfit: Half a Boy and Half a Man

Elvis Costello: Man Out of Time

Jonathan Richman: Ice Cream Man, not to be confused with Tom Waits Ice Cream Man or Bruce Springsteen's Iceman.

Now I'm going to try to think of some from this century. This getting old crap sucks.

The Kenosha Kid said...


Give Me Back My Man, B-52's

The Man Who Sold the World - David Bowie OR Nirvana

How I wrote 'Elastic Man' - The Fall

Monkey Man - Toots & The Maytals OR The Specials OR Amy Winehouse

Waiting for the Man - Velvets

Just Like a Woman - Bob

No Woman No Cry - different Bob

cthulhu said...

No love for the Guess Who's "American Woman"?

I'm also partial to the James Gang's "Woman"; nice guitar riff. Then there's Tonio K, "What Women Want" from his "Notes from the Lost Civilization" CD in 1987.

Spencer Davis Group, "I'm a Man"; saw Steve Winwood on tour this summer (excellent show, BTW) and he did a slightly slowed down, very funky take on this tune. Goddamm, that man can sing (and play the B-3, and a mean guitar too).

Anonymous said...

really, Urge took shit for "Girl..."? I figured its inclusion in Pulp Fiction is what catapulted them to their major label deal (their version was first released on an indie 10").

Johnny Cash/Nick Cave - "Wanted Man"

Spooky Tooth - "Evil Woman"

Bobby Rush - "BowLegged Woman, Knock Kneed Man"

Belafonte/Robert Palmer/Rosanne Cash - "Man Smart Woman Smarter"

Anonymous said...

Hello, please remain seated,

Not sure I've ever heard the Monkey Man versions referenced by Kenosha Kid above...but, are they covers of the Stones Monkey Man? Which would, of course, be my nomination.

Stretching the rules a bit...can I nominate Bowie's Suffragette City for havings that sublimely snotty "Hey maaaan..." prefix to his sung verses?


Brooklyn Girl said...

Lots of songs with "girl" or "boy", but this one is a bit tougher than I thought it would be.

Bunch of soul songs:

"Natural Woman" - Aretha
"When a Man Loves a Woman" - Percy Sledge - GREAT
"When a Man Loves a Woman" - Michael Bolton - KILL ME NOW
"Ain't No Woman (Like the One I've Got) - Four Tops
"it's a Man's World" - James Brown

And, of course:

"Long Cool Woman in a Black Dress" - Hollies
"A Well-Respected Man" - Kinks
"Monkey Man" - Stones
"Honky Tonk Women" - Stones (okay, it's a plural, so sue me)
"I'm a Man" - Yardbirds

This century? I don't have enough brain cells left.

Anonymous said...


Did I miss it?

Excuse any repeats.

Oh, Pretty Woman - Roy Orbison
Oh, Pretty Woman - Albert King
L.A. Woman - The Doors
Black Magic Woman - Fleetwood Mac / Santana
Evil Woman - Crow / Black Sabbath
Cliff Richard - Devil Woman
Marty Robbins - Devil Woman
Sandy Posey - Born a Woman
Dylan - Rainy Day Women #12 & 35
Neil Diamond / Deep Purple - Kentucky Woman
Tod Rundgren - We Gotta Get You a Woman
Woman - Free
Stampeders - Sweet City Woman
Gold Dust Woman - Fleetwood Mac
Eagles - Witchy Woman
Aretha / Burritos - Do Right Woman, Do Right Man
Derek & Dominos - Have You Ever Loved a Woman
The Mentors - Woman from Sodom & White Trash Woman

Vickie Rock - More Than a Woman

Anonymous said...


R.E.O. Speedwagon - Anti-Establishment Man

Village People - Macho Man

Vickie Rock - Woman of a Thousand Years

P.S. Did any one mention Rubber Band Man - Spinners

David Blue / Eagles - Outlaw Man

Poco - Kind Woman

The Gary Puckett stuff is so awful it's great. Sandy and me authored alternate lyrics to make it even better

Young Girl, get out of my bed
You're only good for giving me head
Better run girl, I'm too well hung girl

Anonymous said...

Willie Dixon - Hoochie Coochie Man
Three Dog Night - One Man Band
Zappa - Muffin Man

Vickie Rock - Always a Woman

Anonymous said...

Loretta Lynn - You Ain't Woman Enough

Rainbow - Man On the Silver Mountain

Vickie Rock - Love Me Like a Man

Anonymous said...

Led Zeppelin - Black Country Woman
Maria Muldaur - I'm a Woman (W-O-M-A-N)

Vickie Rock - I can kiss you and give you the shiverin' fits

Anonymous said...


...because they're cool tunes on good albums that deserved to sell better than they actually did.

J. Lag - Don't have time to quote you a rhyme

P.S. Steve-
No mention of your beloved "Natural Man" by the Marcus Hook Roll Band ? Given your recent, enthusiastic post about it, which I very much enjoyed, that might have been overkill.

steve simels said...


pete said...

Steve, one day I'll tell you about the weekend I spent as a roadie for Otway.

steve simels said...

Pete--I can't wait.

steve simels said...

BTW--if you haven't heard that Richard Heyman track, you're really missing something.

Anonymous said...

Gene Vincent "Woman Love"

Alzo said...

Hotlegs (10cc) "Neanderthal Man"
Ben Bolt & the Nuts "Mechanical Man"
The Kinks "20th Century Man"
Simple Kid "Average Man"
The Move "California Man"
J. Geils Band "Hard Drivin' Man"
Joan Osborne "Right Hand Man"
Bob Seger System "Ramblin' Gamblin' Man"
Neil Young "Southern Man"
Dusty Springfield "Son of a Preacher Man"
John Fogerty "The Old Man Down the Road"

Roy Orbison "Oh, Pretty Woman"
Rolling Stones "Honky Tonk Woman"
The Move "Wild Tiger Woman"
Sir Douglas Quintet "Dynamite Woman"
The Doors "L.A. Woman"
The Hollies "Long Cool Woman in a Black Dress"
Fleetwood Mac "Black Magic Woman"
Stevie Wonder "Boogie On, Reggae Woman"
The Eagles "Witchy Woman"
Cliff Richard "Gypsy Woman"
Deep Purple "Strange Kind of Woman"

John F said...

My nominations:

Best Man
The Pogues - "I'm a Man You Don't Meet Every Day", off of Rum, Sodomy & the Lash. Geez, I love this song - sung by Cait O'Roirdan, who left the band after this record to marry Elvis Costello.

Best Woman
Easybeats - "Woman You're On My Mind". I know about this fabulous tune because I am a faithful reader of this very blog. Thanks Steve!

Alternative Choices - Woman
Stevie Wonder - "Boogie On, Reggae Woman", off of Fulfillingness' First Finale. So many good songs from Mr. Wonder in the 70's.
Squeeze - "Woman's World", off of East Side Story. Brilliant.
Ray Charles - "I've Got a Woman". Not sure how this is placed relative to Elvis, but it deserves a mention.

Alternative Choices - Man
Neko Case - "Man", off of The Worse Things Get…. I'm pretty sure this is the most recent nominee I've seen.
Joe Jackson - "I'm the Man", off of I'm the Man. Those first two albums Joe Jackson made really rocked out, this one is fun.
Beatles - "Nowhere Man", off of Rubber Soul. My son & daughter love this tune, were introduced to it via 'Yellow Submarine'.
They Might Be Giants - "Particle Man", off of Flood. Fun video.

Not sure if these qualify for the list, "-man"
XTC - "Snowman", off of English Settlement. One of my favorites off this album.
R.E.M. - "Superman", off of Life's Rich Pageant. Great cover.
Kinks - "Apeman", off of Lola vs. the Powerman & the Moneygoround. Is that 'fogging up my eyes'? Video (live, on Top of the Pops??) is worth a look...

Anonymous said...

Beatles - She's a Woman
King Crimson - 21st Century Schizoid Man
Betty Wright - Clean Up Woman
Tommy Bolin - Savannah Woman [btw, he's the only guy in Deep Purple who knew how to dress, but they were pretty much over by that time]
Theola Kilgore - The Love of My Man
Wilson Pickett - A Man and a Half
John Stewart - July, You're a Woman
Betty Lavette - My Man - He's a Lovin' Man
Lee Dorsey - Get Out of My Life Woman
Captain Beefheart - Mirror Man
Impressions - Gypsy Woman
Merry-Go-Round - You're a Very Lovely Woman
Spirit - Gramophone Man
Gladys Knight & Pips - If I Were Your Woman
Alice Cooper - The Man With the Golden Gun; Only Women Bleed
Laura Lee - Women's Love Rights
Waylon Jennings - Good Hearted Woman
Tony Joe White - My Kind of Woman
WORST- Dave Mason - Every Woman
Bobby Womack - Woman's Gotta Have It
Roxy Music - The Bogus Man
Millie Jackson - My Man, A Sweet Man
Tom Petty - Mystery Man
Bruce - Red Headed Woman
Kinks - Plastic Man
WORST - Sonny & Cher - Plastic Man
Spirit - Dark Eyed Woman
Todd Rundgren - Love of the Common Man
David Bowie - Watch That Man
Loudon Wainwright III - Rufus Is a Tit Man; Last Man On Earth
Ray Charles - I Gotta Woman
Laura Nyro - Hands Off the Man; The Man Who Sends Me Home; Woman's Blues
Heart - Magic Man
Coven - Wicked Woman
Elvis; Cliff Richard; Jerry Lee; Roy Orbison - Mean Woman Blues
The Nails - 88 Lines About 44 Women
Bonnie Raitt - Mighty Tight Woman
Drive-by Truckers - Women Without Whiskey

Adderall and Cabernet Sauvignon Rule

Vickie Rock - Wild Fire Woman

Anonymous said...

Adderall and Cabernet Sauvignon Rule

Speed and alcohol
Explains it all

Anonymous said...

The Yardbirds - Lost Woman
Creedence - Get Down Woman

Mellow and Focused and staying hydrated

Vickie Rock - Angel of the Morning

Anonymous said...

Drug Store Truck Drivin' Man - The Byrds
Tiger Man - Elvis Presley
Solitary Man - Neil Diamond
Ramblin' Man - Allman Brothers Band
Midnight Man - James Gang
A Sweet Woman Like You - Joe Tex
Lightnin' Rod Man - The Factory
Trashy Women - Chris Wall/Jerry Jeff Walker
Woman In Love (It's Not Me) - Tom Petty
Fat Man In the Bath Tub - Little Feat
Working Man; New World Man - Rush
Redneck Woman - Gretchen Wilson
Women In Love - Van Halen
WORST - Bobby Goldsboro - Glad She's a Woman

Vickie Rock - Too Much Woman (For a Hen Pecked Man)

Killing time and thinking about Kathy Marshall, while waiting for mom at radiology.

Anonymous said...

Ray Charles/Everly Brothers/Peter & Gordon - Leave My Woman Alone
Rolling Stones - 2000 Man
Easybeats - Women (Make You Feel Alright); For My Woman
Deep Purple - When a Blind Man Cries
Greatest Show On Earth - Magic Woman Touch
Jerry Reed/Elvis - Guitar Man
Dylan - The Man In Me
Paul Simon – One Man’s Ceiling Is Another Man’s Floor
Herbie Hancock/Mongo Santamaria/Manfred Mann/cast of thousands – Watermelon Man
Rolling Stones - Street Fighting Man [in college I did an essay on Oliver Cromwell and, in some outrageously convoluted way, tied it in with this song - the Yale grad History prof liked my stuff - we had coffee, then drinks - I left him high and dry all semester - other people always wanted to copy my notes but know one knew what they meant]

Vickie Rock – (A Red Rose Blooming On) Another Man's Vine

P.S. Saw El Mierda Costello and Ben Folds with the L.A. Philharmonic tonight at the Bowl. Had good front box seats and wine, but I've never liked the venue. I'd give the night a six out of ten. But I'm a pretty tough grader.

Sandy dressed like La putain respectueuse's Barbara Laage and I went for an Elsa Martinelli 1967 look. Our husband wore a great tux, a rarity [we're gonna rape him later - it's true what they say about a sharp dressed man].

At the last remaining House of Pies for sustenance. We're having the Mile-High Club, the French Dip and the Banana Split. Yum.

M_Sharp said...

John Lennon "Woman Is The N-word Of The World"

Neko Case "Man"
Little Feat "Fat Man In The Bathtub"
Bonnie Raitt "Love Me Like A Man"
Bo Diddley "I'm A Man"

Anonymous said...

Denise LaSalle - Man Sized Job [Cougar anthem extraordinaire - young meat for the CUGA spots]
Janis Joplin - One Good Man
BEST WORST SONG - William Shatner - Rocket Man
Lynyrd Skynyrd - Simple Man
Bad Company - Simple Man
Barbara Lynn/Cold Blood - I'm a Good Woman
Hank Thompson - He's Got a Way With Women (And He Just Got Away With Mine)
Francis Lai/Tamiko Jones & Herbie Mann - Un Homme Et Une Femme
WORST ATTEMPT AT SULTRY - Yoko Ono - Men, Men, Men
Big Brother - I Need a Man To Love
Contours - A Whole Lotta Woman
Merle Haggard/Lynyrd Skynyrd - Honky Tonk Night Time Man
T. Rex - Lean Woman Blues
Allman Brothers Band - Black Hearted Woman
Grateful Dead - Brown Eyed Women
Ella Brown/Janis Joplin/Charlie Rich - A Woman Left Lonely
Marshall Chapman - Take It Like a Man

Vickie Rock - Smart Woman (In a Real Short Skirt)

RE Tom Petty's Mystery Man this is kinda cool if you care:

and the almost full show from whence it came [Del Shannon doing Runaway with the Heartbreakers is cut:-( WTF!] I was at this one and had seen them a dozen times previously. This is an off night. Kind of tentative and disappointing to me at the time, but OK to hear after 36 years. Stan Lynch rules, even if he did steal a guy friend of mine's long time girlfriend.

Anonymous said...

You are free to visit the House of Pies in Houston, Vickie. Site of the planning of the murders in T Thompson's "Blood and Money."

Anonymous said...

Somebody apparently knows how to use Google.

And doesn't know when to shut up.

Phil Cheese said...

Hey, how could y'all forget American Woman by The Guess Who? I can see that song being placed on either list. When I saw Burton Cummings sing it in concert, he ran his tongue down the mic stand, licking the shaft for about two feet. Whoa!

Anonymous said...

Phil Cheese: cdhulhu mentioned American Woman in one of the earliest comments, but it's certainly worth a second mention.

She's got no posters hanging on her wall, just a tattered old Union Jack.

Vickie Rock - The roast beef is gone

tduke2200 said...

Cheap Trick - "California Man"