Weekend Listomania: Special "If Brevity is the Soul of Wit, How Come the Minimalists Aren't the Funniest Guys Ever?" Edition

Hey, we're all busy these days, so let's get directly to the business at hand! To wit --

Best or Worst Post-Elvis Pop/Rock/Soul/Folk/R&B/Country/Hip Hop Record Immediately Identifiable by Its Opening Riff/Instrumental Intro!!!

No arbitrary rules, you're welcome very much, but I have to say that after putting this together I was struck -- to my surprise, actually -- by how heavily slanted towards music from the Sixties it is. Then when I thought about it, however, I realized that yeah, opening riffs/intros are pretty much a lost art in contemporary pop.

More to the point, I was in an Uber the other day for about 45 minutes, and the driver had the radio tuned to WKTU, which is a New York station that used to be Disco Central and is now just the link you click that plays all the hits, or the genre officially called Adult Contemporary (yecch!). And I heard recent songs by Taylor Swift, Beyonce, Adele, Ed Sheeran, Ariana Grande and a few others of that ilk and not one of them had anything like an interesting intro (or even an intro per se period. And don't get me started on the drum parts, none of which were played live on real drums).

Anyway, my Totally Top of My Head Top Ten is...

10. Tone Loc -- Funky Cold Medina

Sampled guitar riffs from Foreigner and Kiss get smushed together and then they all go out to Chipotle.

9. Cream -- Sunshine of Your Love

Hey, when Cream were bad, they really sucked. I mean, that ponderous pompous insufferable riff...yeesh. Seriously, if they were trying to write the "Louie Louie" of the late '60s, couldn't they have rocked a little harder?

8. Norman Greenbaum -- Spirit in the Sky

I don't hate this song as much as a certain Shady Dame of my acquaintance does, but I gotta say that when that opening fuzz riff comes on the radio or in a TV commercial I generally (to paraphrase Mission of Burma) start to reach for my revolver.

7. The Beatles -- A Hard Day's Night

The most famous opening (G7sus4) chord in music history, justifiably.

6. Smokey Robinson and the Miracles -- The Tracks of My Tears

From Motown, the home of the Great Opening Riff©.

I gotta tell you, every time I hear that chiming guitar and bass thing at the top of this one I get all warm and runny.

5. Nirvana -- Smells Like Teen Spirit

Well, those kids certainly knew how to grab your attention, didn't they?

4. The Byrds -- Mr. Tambourine Man

Actually, this should be a tie with the Byrds' subsequent hit "Turn Turn Turn," whose opening is equally memorable.

3. Eddie Cochran -- Summertime Blues

Rockabilly anticipating metal, and if you prefer the Who's version, I won't hold it against you. I like the twang on the original a lot, though.

2. The Easybeats -- Friday on My Mind

Those chiming introductary octaves -- be still my beating heart!!!

And the Number One You Know What It Is From The Very First Note song obviously (and don't even try to change my opinion on this) is...

1. The Rolling Stones -- Satisfaction

I should add that I've always loved the fact that the riff came to the song's co-writer Keith Richards in a dream (or so he claims), and that he immediately woke up and recorded it on acoustic guitar onto a cheap mono cassette and went back to bed. And that when he woke up again afterwards, he had forgotten how to play it until he listened to the tape. I mean -- talk about a mysterious creative process.

Alrighty then -- what would YOUR choices be?

And have a great weekend, everybody!!!

[Oh -- and a coveted PowerPop No-Prize© goes to reader Anonymous RS who came up with this week's theme! Congratulations, my elusive pal!]