It's official -- Newsweek's pop music person Jac Chebatoris is an even more cloying prose stylist than the New York Times' eternally irksome Kelefa Sanneh.
Here's the lede to Jac's review of the new album by a certain country music icon.
Dolly Parton excels at being Dolly Parton, and I love her for it. On the cover of her new CD, my girl—now 62—reclines on a pile of hay in the back of a pickup truck, resplendent in a leopard-print bodysuit, her belt cinching a diaphanous, hot-pink trench coat around her wasp waist. What's with all the frisky imagery? The title of the album is "Backwoods Barbie," and Dolly clearly wants to make sure she's got our attention, because she's got a few things she'd like to say.
You can read the rest here, but trust me -- it gets worse.
Seriously, I was worried that -- given Sanneh's iminent departure from the Times -- I wouldn't have anybody's embarassing fanboy gush to make fun of on a regular basis any more. Clearly, this won't be a problem....
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6 comments:
Dolly Parton excels at being Dolly Parton
What a relief! I was worried that she might excel at being somebody else.
What's happening to Kelefa? Did he get a gig with Teen Beat?
Sanneh is over to the New Yorker, where I can only presume he is NOT going to be writing about pop music, as they already have somebody vastly superior.
Although, the idea that some editor over there dug his prose style enough to hire him to do anything frankly boggles my tiny mind...
"You better stop whinin', pinin', get your dreams in line and then just shine, design, refine 'til they come true," she sings over a banjo in that voice of hers, still powerful and clear after all these years. She's like the life coach you never realized you needed. (Excerpt from Backstreet Barbie review
Like the life coach you never realized you needed? Ugh, I guess it did get worse. Somewhat reminds me of the writing style of the CD reviewer (name withheld) at our local newspaper (name also withheld. This one should be keeping you busy, Steve
Steve: You are the evil rascal!!! Hell your so bad your a Weasel!!!! To pick on an inferior writer just because they suck!
ROTP(lumber)
I am not sure why, but I read the full, I cannot call it a review, piece. Yes, piece will do quite nicely. It reminds me of an Entertainment Tonight segment on some C list personailty who is donating time to help tree bound kittens.
Really, truly vacuous.
Trey
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